A week ago I did a little venting about my sick dog and how I balance stress and life. Boy, has the last 7 days tested my will, patience, motivation, and strength!
My pup did end up getting diagnosed with pancreatitis and we moved forward with treatment that following day. It was a rough (no pun intended!) She had vet visits everyday, one of which she was there for 10 hours with a constant IV; she was not responding well to certain medicines, and, at one point, there was talk of having to "open her up" to find out what the hell was going on! But today, we received some good news (finally!) Her pancreatitis is almost completely treated and her other tests are not showing any other concerning results. The hope is now that she is back on track to a full recovery and she will once again be my happy, and healthy Chloe!
I do take pride that I handled the hard week relatively well. Minus a few food indulgences, I stayed strong and calm throughout the hardest of the bad days. I also didn't slack off (too much) with my school work. With my online English course, our weekly assignments are due every Sunday night. Because of my situation, I barely even looked at the assignment until Sunday morning. I was half tempted to blow it off and accept a "0" and just move forward, however, I knew that that choice would just start me off on the complete wrong foot for this semester and I did not want that. So, in true procrastinator fashion, I started my lengthy assignment at 2pm and completed it with 3 hours to spare (due time was 11pm) While doing it, I definitely wanted to say "screw it" and go back to the couch and watch TV but I toughed it out and was very proud of myself for doing so.
In other news, this whole situation has opened my eyes to how attached I am/was to my phone. I know this seems like a random statement but hear me out (or read me out? hrm...) I was receiving an overwhelming amount of text messages throughout this week asking for updates on Chloe. Of course, it meant so much that my closest friends and family were concerned and wanted to make sure she was okay, however, there were times that I, myself, needed to be "okay", and that consisted of being left alone. That may sound harsh, but as most people know, I am very much an introvert and I do not like to be overloaded with social activity, especially when I am trying to process some very tough emotions (and keep in mind, this is the first serious/emotional situation since I have been sober, and that added in some extra stress) I did update those as I received new information however, it just would have been nice if some people realized that if I didn't respond within a few hours, it didn't mean I wasn't going to not respond at all. It just meant I was dealing with a lot and when I made the time to regurgitate all the information that was being thrown out at me they would be the first on the list to receive a reply.
With all that being said, I am distancing myself from my phone just a little bit more from here on out. It doesn't mean I love anyone any less, or that I am going through any sort of depression, I just didn't like the feeling I got with having to jump up and reply to every message as it came in. And when I didn't respond, people worried or freaked out. Of course I will still be posting on Istagram, browsing my Facebook, and keeping up on my blog(s) but there will be times that my phone is left in my purse, or up on the counter on silent. And, before anyone gets offended, I am not referring to anyone specifically so please, no one take this personal!
It's only the first month of this new year and I have already been challenged! But I have learned from my past and am confident that I won't let all that has happened so far, throw me off my path towards a happier, healthier me!
Until next time...
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